Father's Day

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse.
Malachi 4:6 NIV

Father's day always reminds me how I missed out on what a blessing having a dad can be growing up.  My dad left our family when I was 13 and really never looked back. There was a short interval where he had custody of my brother, sister and I out of necessity, but it really did not work out and his unchecked anger forced my brother and I to frequently run away. Eventually we chose to live with our mother in a homeless shelter.

It says something when you choose to be homeless over living with your dad.

I understand now that my dad was not equipped to deal with raising three children on his own and that he was dealing with a lot of bad boxes (temptation) of his own. He was raised in a situation where he was beaten and never learned a different way of handling his emotions. He did not have a relationship with God. It was a recipe for disaster. He did the right thing in letting us go.

But I still would have like to have some kind of contact, a relationship or closeness. As it stands, I know very little about his life and he knows very little about mine. That makes me sad in a way, but only because I lack that closeness on earth.

I praise God that I have him to fill the void. He is the Father I always dreamed of. He will always be there for me.

...Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9 NIV

Leadership

There's a phrase that is used frequently (I use that term lightly) in the Servant-Leadership class at Life Bridge Christian Church.

"Leadership is not about power or position. It's about walking with God and helping others get there."

There was a time, even when I was going through the class, when that phrase was not so easily at the tip of my tongue and if asked, I struggled to come up with the phrase. Leadership is what?

In the world, we are taught to ascend the corporate ladder. That in order to be worthwhile, we have to do something, be something.

Even motherhood and raising a family is not enough for a woman anymore. I was talking with a very wise Builder who told me, "There was a time that being a stay at home mom was enough. People knew it was a full-time job. Now they expect more." How true this is. When I chose to leave my old life, where I was what I call "a professional jerk," and focus on my relationship with God, my relationship with my children and working in the local church -- in that order, I often am asked the same set of questions.

"So, Missi, what do you do now."
"After you graduate, what are you going to do?"
"When the kids are in school, what will you do?"

The thing is, I am doing exactly what I believe God wants me to be doing. My first ministry is to my family. I am called first to be a Leader here, in this home. My "job" is walk with God, and to help my kids get there. My next "job" is to be Communications Coordinator at Life Bridge. Whenever I finish my education, I don't anticipate these jobs changing, only that my relationship with all three of these entities should be closer.

It's hard to grasp, because the world sends a totally different message. It says climb the ladder. Jesus says, "Come on down."

"But Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must become your slave. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Matthew 20:25-28 NLT